One of the very important objectives of HHHO is to ensure that EVERYONE gets support. Cancer affects everyone that knows the patient, and through lived experience, Georgie understood the lack of support for wider family and friends.
HHHO Prides itself on helping everyone that is affected by cancer with immediacy, empathy and urgency. Here we share a story of one service user who desparately needd help for her son whose friend is terminally ill with cancer……….
Help Harry Help Others – Adele’s Story
Adele is 44 and lives in Birmingham with her three young children who range from ages three to 14 years. Adele turned to Help Harry Help Others when looking at how she could help her 14 year old son cope with his friend’s terminal cancer diagnosis.
Where do you even begin to support a child who is witnessing their best friend dying from cancer. Unsurprisingly, my son didn’t take the news of his friend’s diagnosis well at all. My son has asperger’s syndrome, which made an already very difficult situation even harder to navigate. The school suggested we get access to counselling, at the same time that we as a family were trying to work out how we could best support him too. My son is understandably very emotional where his friend is concerned, so I wanted to give him the best support possible. Can you imagine being that age and watching your friend have to go through an ordeal like that? Finding the charity has been a godsend.
I thought Help Harry Help Others was a charity just for adults, and those specifically with brain tumours. I knew about the charity because of Harry’s story, and I had even met Georgie years ago at a work event, but I didn’t realise how extensive the breadth of support was on offer. After we had the conversation with the school, we called HHHO to get advice. They explained they do counselling sessions and special social groups for children and teens. We talked through how they could help us and a week later we were meeting my son’s counsellor.
The charity has helped me so much too. The situation feels so unfair. I don’t understand how to process it, and I’m an adult. Attending the centre to take my son to his counselling sessions has meant I have been able to sit and connect with some amazing people. It has helped me understand more about what people are going through and given me an insight into how I can support my son and what to say to him. Each week I sit with my three year old, the volunteers and some of those who are dealing with cancer themselves. They listen. I listen. We chat about anything and everything. This place is a lifeline to so many people. I’ve learnt that people want to have space to tell their stories amongst others who understand them. Help Harry Help Others allows for that.
My son loves to come now but he didn’t want to at first. He has been coming since the beginning of the year but when I first suggested it to him he was adamant he wasn’t going. Thank goodness he agreed to give it a go. When we first attended he was very reserved, with his head down and me doing all the talking in his introduction session. Now each week he asks if he is going for his usual Tuesday session. He’s more confident than he was before, and will even chat to the team independently and grab himself a biscuit. It sounds like a small thing, but he would never have done that without visiting the centre.
I know the charity will always be here for us. The journey is ongoing. Although my son only has a few sessions left of his current counselling, the door is always open. We have been invited to come to Time4Teens on a Thursday – a weekly after school club run for teens to have fun and be amongst others that are going through similar experiences – and more counselling sessions when the inevitable time comes.
It’s about creating memories. The charity has organised and paid for some fantastic events for the children. We’ve been to Monster Trucks and Dudley Zoo with my son and his friend. It’s another memory for the boys. They have pictures and a shared experience they can talk and laugh about.
I think people think it is a bigger charity than it is. When I heard that it costs £850 per day to run the centre, I was staggered! Help Harry Help Others makes me feel like I’m a part of the family but they expect nothing in return. Georgie is like a superwoman and her team are fantastic. Long may it continue, but we need more people to get behind the charity to ensure we still have the centre to turn to. I really hope more people find out about all the support they offer and how they can support the charity in return.
All the above is made possible thanks to our incredible supporters. With your efforts in fundraising and volunteering for us, this enables us to address issues our service users face. we cannot thank you enough for your support.
HHHO offer a range of services and support for young people affected by cancer. we support the patient, relative, carer, and like in this story – the friend. Whether you need one to one counselling support, or social interaction with other peers affected by cancer. Do reach out to find the best support for you. Email Lianne@hhho.org.uk